


White Hot

by Killerrach



Category: Avatar: The Last Airbender
Genre: Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Hurt/Comfort, Idiots in Love, Mutual Pining, Oops, Toph threatens the fire nation, a little bit of ptsd, katara also sort of threatens the fire nation, this is about zukos scar, zuko gets all the love he deserves
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-22
Updated: 2020-06-22
Packaged: 2021-03-03 21:06:50
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,951
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24852040
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Killerrach/pseuds/Killerrach
Summary: “Can’t really ‘see’ me though, can you, short stack?”The painful kick he received under the table stung his knee, but it was worth it.  Toph was quiet for a moment as Zuko laughed to himself, before she blurted out;“Aang told me you have a scar on your face.  How did you get it?”Zuko stopped laughing immediately, completely caught off guard, and almost dropped the teacup on the table.  He had always figured Sokka and his impulsive mouth would be the first to ask.Or; the Gaang finds out how Zuko got his scar + a lil zukka. as a treat.
Relationships: Aang & Zuko (Avatar), Katara & Zuko (Avatar), Sokka/Zuko (Avatar), Toph Beifong & Zuko
Comments: 152
Kudos: 3138





	White Hot

**Author's Note:**

> My first ATLA fic! I adore Zuko and really enjoyed trying to write a fic centered on him but also making sure all of the other characters were still recognizable. We can have a little Zukka. As a treat. This takes place after the war so they're older idk when, thats up to ur imagination. I wrote this mostly drunk as I listened to Eyna so just...take it.

Toph had been the first to ask.

In hindsight, Zuko should have seen it coming. In fact, he _had_ seen it coming. A year ago.

Last year after the war ended and Zuko had officially become a part of Team Avatar, he dreaded the day his newfound friends would ask him about his scar. Katara had been close that day in Ba Sing Se, but despite how close they had become since then, not even she knew the full story. It wasn’t that he didn’t trust his friends or even that it was too painful to talk about. He had been dealing with the grief and trauma that the scar had inflicted upon his life for years now, and deep down he knew that his friends would only want to help, just as Iroh had. Taking back his scar was something that Zuko was constantly working towards. He knew that they would understand.

But still, Zuko was afraid of their help. He had no reason to be, and he knew the whole melodrama he had concocted about his scar in his head was misplaced, but he was _afraid._ The last time he had felt such strong emotions -that weren’t just pure anger- they had drained him. He had felt more vulnerable than ever, and although he had also felt lighter, it had completely terrified him. He was a coward, and he didn’t want to open the door that he was sure would unleash bigger and stronger emotions than he was capable of dealing with all because of the scar that had cost him so much. He had too much on his plate as the Fire Lord to be hung up with silly emotions about a silly old scar.

Toph didn’t seem to think so, though.

He had been in the Earth Kingdom on business, but extended his stay so that he could visit his uncle at The Jasmine Dragon with Toph. Uncle was extremely fond of Toph. Of all of Team Avatar, she was the one he had met first, and their bond was almost physically visible to the point where it almost annoyed Zuko. All of the gaang enjoyed tormenting him with Iroh, but Toph was the worst. She laughed and pointed at him loudly, slapped his arm so hard that the guards that he had ordered not to follow him (they still did) had almost burst into the tea shop, and she wiggled her eyebrows suggestively whenever Sokka was mentioned. Zuko was glad that she was never able to see how the good side of his face would darken with a deep red that matched his scarred side. She would never let him live it down. Uncle laughed jovially and excused himself to make them more tea while Zuko and Toph whisper shouted obscenities at each other from across the table. Iroh walked away with a huge smile, lightly humming a familiar tune that shook Zuko from his annoyance. Toph was smiling at him from across the table.

“It’s good to see you again, Sparky.”

Zuko smiled in spite of himself. He really had missed her. Being the Fire Lord had kept him busy, and with the group split up, he had found himself quite lonely. He was glad of Tophs company, even if he would have some new bruises coming back to the Fire Nation with him. He smiled mischievously as he picked up the remainder of his tea, pulling in his legs underneath the table. He knew he shouldn’t say it but…

“Can’t really ‘see’ me though, can you, short stack?”

The painful kick he received under the table stung his knee, but it was worth it. Toph was quiet for a moment as Zuko laughed to himself, before she blurted out;

“Aang told me you have a scar on your face. How did you get it?”

Zuko stopped laughing immediately, completely caught off guard, and almost dropped the teacup on the table. He had always figured Sokka and his impulsive mouth would be the first to ask.

“Uh...I-”

Toph stared expectantly. There was no _“oh nevermind you don’t have to tell me if you don’t want to”_ or _“that was insensitive of me, I’ll let you come to me when you’re ready to talk”_ from her. She waited patiently, sipping at the last few drops of her chamomile without a care in the world. Zuko frowned slightly, but wasn’t really all that surprised. Toph hardly ever let anyone off easily.

“It’s not a very pleasant tale.”

“Well I would assume not,” She retorted stubbornly. Zuko fought off the urge to smile at her bluntness as he beat the panic that was steadily growing in his chest back down. He sighed as he stared down the small girl in front of him.

“When I was thirteen I was allowed to sit in an important war meeting that my father was conducting.” He swallowed thickly, hyper aware of the fact that Toph would not be able to pick up on any of his facial cues, only his heartbeat, which he knew was pounding quickly in his chest.

“A general proposed an idea, one that would get many of our own men killed. Purposefully lose a small battle to win a bigger one.” Zuko couldn’t keep the bitterness out of his voice, but as he stared across the table at Toph, whose face had gone neutral as he told his story, he found it easy to talk about that moment for the first time in years.

“It would have worked,” Zuko continued angrily, “but at a high price. I couldn’t believe the flippancy with which the leaders of our nation talked about our own soldiers, so I said so.” Toph had set her cup down. The shop was eerily quiet, and Zuko suspected that his uncle was purposefully taking a long time to bring their refills.

“My father didn’t like that,” He continued. “I was challenged to an Agni Kai for speaking out against the general.”

There was a quick tinkling sound of broken glass as Toph knocked her cup over. Zuko stared in surprise at the small broken glass shards, the only remainder of Iroh’s favorite tea set; white porcelain with delicate red and blue dragons painted around it.

“That’s Uncle's favorite cup,” He said weakly, but Toph was paying no mind to the broken glass. Her hands were fisted tightly.

“An Agni Kai? Like what you had to do with Azula? Katara told me about those. You had to fight a Fire Nation General at _thirteen?_!”

“Actually,” Zuko said as he picked up the pieces of broken glass in front of them so Toph wouldn’t accidentally smash her hand into one of the shards, “I had to fight my father.”

Toph landed in her chair with a dull thud and a look of terror on her young face. They sat in silence for a moment as she took in what Zuko had said. He shifted uncomfortably. Toph's horror was calming in a way. It reminded him that he had been a child, and he hadn’t deserved that. Something in Toph’s expression shifted; her face hardened and she breathed out a long calming breath. She reached her hand out across the table, palm up, waiting expectantly. Zuko stared at it.

“I’m trying to comfort you here, Sparky.” Toph said, blushing.

“Oh!” Zuko said as he hurriedly grabbed Toph’s hand. Neither of them were really good at feelings. Her hand was small and calloused, but warm and comforting, and Zuko felt an inner peace that he hadn’t felt in a long time. Not since before he took the throne.

“Thanks, Toph,” he said quietly as he squeezed her hand, “But I’m okay now. Really.” She nodded and let go of him, accidentally lightly dragging her hand over her own broken teacup.

“Well if _I_ had to fight my father at thirteen, I would have whooped his butt.” She said matter-of-factly. She was downplaying the situation for him, and Zuko felt heat rush up the back of his neck. People didn’t often show him kindness, especially Toph.

“But I didn’t fight him,” Zuko replied simply, and Toph’s mouth fell open again.

“What do you mean? You _just_ told me that he challenged you to an Agni Kai.”

Zuko shrugged before he remembered that Toph couldn’t actually see him. He glanced around the shop, which had begun to pick up. Uncle was seen flitting in between tables and the counter making sure all of his customers were happy. He had quietly filled up both of their cups on his way to the table behind them, winking at Zuko and gently patting Toph on her shoulder as he passed.

“I didn’t fight back,” Zuko said simply, as he picked up his tea. Uncle’s chamomile always calmed his “inner chi” as Aang called it. Toph was staring at the wall in front of them dumbstruck. Zuko chuckled to himself as he watched her try to wrestle with the idea of not fighting back at a challenge.

“So you’re telling me,” she started, “that your father. _The Fire Lord_ , challenged a thirteen year old boy to an Agni Kai.”

“Yes.”

“His own son.”

“Yes.”

“And when you didn’t fight back, he still...he still burnt you. On your _face._ ”

Zuko looked down miserably.

“Yes.”

Toph immediately launched herself from her chair at a speed that not even Zuko, who had been well trained, could keep up with. In a matter of moments she was running through the tea shop and out the door to where two “earth nation” customers sat on a bench in the plaza, “sipping sake” and “enjoying the day”. Zuko watched in awe as she started yelling at the both of them, demanding to know what prison Ozai was locked up in and would he like to meet her two fists? Because if not I have an entire army of rocks to work with!

Zuko was still getting over the fact that Toph had immediately picked up on the fact that he had two undercover guards with him, (which really shouldn’t have been a surprise, she did have magical feet after all) when Uncle came up to him, still humming his little tune.

“She is quite ferocious.”

Zuko nodded in agreement as he adjusted his hood. People were beginning to stare at the boy who had been with the crazy, screaming blind girl.

“She is.”

“A friendship that strong is not something to take for granted, nephew.”

“I know, Uncle.”

And he did.

Iroh turned to him with sparkling eyes and a wide smile, and Zuko remembered in an instant where he had heard the song Iroh had been humming before. He smiled down at his little old Uncle, and walked with him to the front of the shop, where they could see Toph bending the decorative arm bands around the guards into pointed daggers that she was holding tauntingly above their heads through the window. Zuko smiled in spite of himself. He may be the Fire Lord now, but knowing that the greatest earth bender in the world would go so hard for him against his own guards had lighted a small, warm flame inside of his chest.

Golden, like the color of his eyes. Like the color of his nation. Like the color Zuko had come to associate with acceptance.

“I know you do, Zuko. I know.”

* * *

Zuko was still a sixteen year old banished prince when he found out that the people of the Water Tribe, specifically Sokka and Katara, were a good balance to his fiery nature. It made sense. If uncle was to be believed, then the Water Tribes and the Fire Nation had more in common than he had originally thought. As time went on, Zuko found this to be true. Both Katara and Aang had shown him waterbending moves that helped him grow as a firebender. He had a better understanding of the world, the Water Tribes, and the Fire Nation because of his new Water Tribe friends. They balanced each other out, but it was Katara who he found it easiest to just be himself around. It had shocked the both of them when they fell into an easy friendship, but after they had visited the Southern Raiders and then had their showdown with Azula, Katara had kept Zuko close. She wrote to him all the time, telling him of her travels with Aang and Appa and Momo, and Zuko had always happily replied with the happenings of the Fire Nation.

He knew that she worried about him. _"I imagine you’re lonely in that giant palace all by yourself! Don’t worry, Aang and I will be by to visit soon. And maybe we’ll bring Sokka, too!_ "She had written in her last letter. Zuko rolled his eyes at the last line, annoyed at the heat that was spreading across his cheeks. Zuko had never flat out told Katara about his... _feelings_...for her brother, but he wouldn’t put it past her for her to have guessed. Despite his inner romantic turmoil, he found himself excited, on the verge of jittery, for their visit. It had been almost a year since he had visited Toph and Uncle in the Earth Kingdom, and although Iroh had made plenty of visits to the palace since then, he had begun to ache for his old friends again.

When Katara showed up, she was alone. Aang had gotten roped into a spiritual showdown on Kyoshi Island, and Sokka was still working hard with Hakoda down at the South Pole. Zuko didn’t mind, one friend was better than none. Katara had jumped down off of Appa with delicate grace, her long hair blowing free in the wind. She was already wearing her red Fire Nation robes, and Zuko had an inner chuckle at her ability to be ready at a moment's notice. He stood next to his two guards, (the same two poor souls who had traveled to the Earth Kingdom with him) and watched as Katara began to run towards him. He had managed about three whole seconds before he sprinted after her, too. When she hugged him, he picked her up and spun her around the same way he had seen Sokka do. The way he wished he could do for Azula. The guards behind them cleared their throats and Zuko gently put Katara down. She bowed at the waist, rolling her eyes, as she said,

“Firelord Zuko.”

“Just Zuko is fine, Katara.”

Katara raised out of her bow and smiled at him, ignoring the scandalized look on the guards faces, but Zuko felt weird with her bowing to him. Toph had _never_ been caught bowing to him, and Katara was the girlfriend of the _Avatar_. Katara immediately looped her arm through Zukos, and the two began walking back towards the palace. Zuko had the guards take her bags up, (just one. Katara still traveled light.) as he took her around the grounds. They chatted and caught up with each other as Zuko pointed out some of his favorite spots around the palace. It wasn’t anything Katara hadn’t seen before, but she let him go on about the turtleduck pond anyways, and he smiled fondly over at her.

“Hows Aang?”

“Great! He sends his love which you know, he has a lot of. He promises to be by soon and says you’re doing a great job of leading.”

Zuko smiled stiffly, the compliment was a relief, but it was still odd to hear. He was trying _so hard_. It was good to have the Avatar on his side. Katara squeezed his arm. They were sitting at the edge of the pond now, legs outstretched underneath the warm sun.

“Hey,” she said tugging lightly on his robes, “you _are_ doing a good job.” Zuko smiled, for real this time, and thanked her. She nodded lightly, her bright eyes a little watery, before launching into a story about how Aang challenged Suki to a Giant Koi Riding Contest, and then thoroughly had his ass handed to him. Zuko found himself laughing along with Katara, the stress and worry of ruling a nation rolling off of his shoulders in waves.

“I’m sure Aang was the epitome of a good sport, though,” He said as he wiped a tear from his eyes. Katara was hunched over laughing, but nodded in assent.

“Oh yeah,” she said once she had calmed down long enough to breathe, “he’s even calling her Sifu Koi Rider.” Zuko burst out laughing again, as his chest tightened. He really missed that bald little monk.

“Better than Sifu Hotman.”

“I don’t know,” Katara said shrugging, a mischievous glint in her eyes. “I’m sure there are plenty of ladies in the fire nation who would agree-”

“Katara _please_ -” Zuko begged as his face flared up immediately, and Katara bent over with laughter once again. He rolled his eyes fondly, but sent up a silent thank you to the spirits that she hadn’t been able to see through his romantic bluff. Katara still didn’t know that he sort of maybe kind of had feelings for her brother. He sighed in relief to find her watching him with warm eyes.

“Come on, Firelord,” She said, pulling him to his feet, “I’m hungry.”

Zuko had made sure to have plenty of sea prunes for his friend at dinner. She had almost burst into tears on the spot, and actually _did_ when he told her that they were all for her. It was one of the things Zuko silently agreed with Aang upon. Sea prunes were bad.

They had a nice easy going dinner full of chatter and jokes, just the two of them, and a _lot_ of sake. He didn't know Katara could drink like that, but she had informed him that the only person to beat her at the annual South Pole drinking contest last winter was Bato. Sokka had passed out after two drinks. Zuko laughed at the image of Sokka completely zonked out while Katara went on to out-drink the entirety of the Southern Water Tribe, and tried to ignore the knowing glint in her eyes.

Dinner turned into dessert which turned into drinks which turned into more drinks which somehow, eventually, turned into the two of them laying on the floor of Zuko's chambers, completely trashed and staring at the ceiling. Katara was singing to herself while Zuko tried to trace constellations into the ceiling, but the ceiling was spinning and not cooperating with him.

“I missed you,” Katara admitted out of the blue, shaking him out of his concentration. He had almost finished drawing Tui and La. He tried to turn towards her, but ended up smacking his face into the post of his bed on the opposite side of where she was.

“Imithedyouthoo.” He mumbled into the wood, and Katara laughed. It took a lot of effort to spin around to face her, and he had to take a moment to fight with reality as the world spun around him. When he finally found focus again, he could see Katara. She was about a foot away from him, her arms behind her head as she stared up at his dark ceiling. He wondered if she was as drunk as he was.

“Is that...Momo, on your ceiling?”

So that was a yes.

Zuko looked up at his ceiling, ready to roll his eyes and mock Katara to the end of the earth, but...

“Holy fuck, is _it?_..” Zuko sat up and immediately regretted it. His head started swimming again but he focused on the Momo shape on his ceiling.

“Momo?” He called tentatively. Next to him Katara, who was still laying on the floor, burst out laughing.

“Zuko,” she panted, but Zuko was still squinting at the ceiling. “Zuko, it's a shadow!”

Zuko fell back against the floor, his own laughter mixing in well with Katara’s as they stared up at the ceiling together. A calming and easy silence eventually fell over them, and Zuko wondered if Katara had fallen asleep. He turned towards her and she smiled back, awake as ever. Her smile faltered when she saw his face, and she attempted to sit up.

“Katara…?”

“Zuko, you’re hurt.” Zuko looked up at her questioningly. He didn’t _feel_ hurt.

“Huh?”

“Your…” she looked down. “Your scar,” she whispered. Zuko’s hand flew up to his scar. He felt along the ridges, the lines he had memorized when he was a kid. He remembered the way he would trace the lines over and over again with his own fingers until he had accepted it. Accepted that he had deserved his punishment. He looked up into Katara’s worried eyes and pushed that silly thought out of his head.

“What do you mean?”

She bent down towards him, worry scrunching her brows as she lightly trailed her fingers along the lower half of his scar.

“You’re bleeding,” She thought for a moment, and Zuko swore he saw the exact moment when Katara figured it out.

“The bedpost! You hit your face on the bedpost!” Zuko raised his hand to his face, brushing against the unmistakable traces of dried blood.

“Oh,” he said unfazed. Katara was giggling into her hand again, and Zuko giggled too. “It’s fine, Katara. I didn’t even feel it. I’ve definitely felt worse on that spot.” He was going for funny, trying to make a joke on his own behalf, but Katara had seemed to sober up almost immediately. She crossed her legs and looked down at him so intensely that he felt the urge to sit up himself.

“Zuko…”

“I’m _fine,_ Katara. Really. It’s just a scar, and anyways I’ve already unpacked all of the damage and sorted it into neat little boxes, besides after Toph found out that it was my dad she almost walked from the Earth Kingdom to the Fire Nation just to beat him up so I swear, I’m fine-” Katara’s eyes had blown wide. She stared in horror at Zuko, but unlike the time with Toph, this time it didn’t make him feel better. He squinted his eyes as he mentally went back through what he just said searching...searching...until he found… _”after Toph found out that it was my dad”_.. Ah. There it is. Zuko sighed.

“Your dad!?”

For some reason, Katara’s anger was different from Tophs. Toph was always angry. It was to be expected. Whenever Katara was angry, Zuko knew that there was a much deeper reason for it.

“Yeah,” he said trying to downplay it and save their night, “but really it’s okay-”

“Okay?? Zuko, your dad burned your face, and it’s okay??”

It wasn’t okay. Zuko knew that. He had blamed everyone; Azula, Iroh, his mother, especially himself, before he blamed Ozai. No, it wasn’t okay. But Zuko was better now.

“Katara, I already dealt with all of this,” he was pleading now, trying to convince the both of them that he already sorted through all of this grief, that he didn’t want to have to do it again, but she wasn’t listening. She had stood up and was pacing back and forth in his bedroom. She was bending the water from the jug on his bedside table in between her hands, and as Zuko watched her he thought that maybe she didn’t even realize that she was doing it.

“All this time...all this time we thought it was a training accident and it was your _dad_? Is that why...that’s why you were so hung up on finding Aang?”

Zuko sighed and looked down. He nodded.

“Oh my god,” Katara groaned. “Oh my _god_.”

“Katara,”

“And here I spent all that time thinking you were just a selfish, Fire Nation prick-”

“I was.”

“-and that you had no sense of self or right or wrong-”

“I didn’t.”

“-and you’re telling me all this time your lost honor was just your father's _love???_ ” Zuko looked up sharply. Katara had tears in her eyes, and he knew that part if it was the sake. They really had had a lot to drink. But the other part of it, well that was Katara grieving. On his behalf. He looked down, feeling shaken.

“Yeah,” he mumbled quietly, and Katara sat back down next to him squeezing his hand. A lot passed between them unspoken that Zuko was thankful for. She had already forgiven him for his past transgressions, and now she understood why he had done them. He knew that it still didn’t make his actions right, but he also knew that Katara knew that he knew that. If that made sense. He was trying to sort it all out in his head when Katara wrapped her thin arms around him and hugged him deeply.

“I’m sorry, Zuko,” she whispered to him.

“Me too,” He whispered back.

They sat together, the rest of the night, and Zuko told her the same story he had told Toph all those months ago. She asked questions, and he answered them. Her eyes were wet, but the anger never left them. He wondered, briefly, if he had told her all of this in Ba Sing Se if things would have turned out differently. He was sure that they would have, but it wouldn’t have been the path he was meant to take. He had come to terms with the decisions he had made leading up to where he was now, and was glad to say that he had learned from them. But sitting there with Katara that night, he watched fire dance in her eyes. The last time he had seen her eyes so violent was in the middle of the pouring rain, as she contemplated taking a mans life… she was angry, and she was angry for him.

He felt the small flame inside of his chest grow, red this time. Red for Katara’s anger. Red for the anger of the Fire Nation. Red, for the anger that Zuko still had burning in his own heart.

Anger that as long as he kept in check, he knew he had every right to feel. He looked over at his friend, his dear friend, and he let himself truly feel that anger. The anger he had never let himself feel, the anger directed at his father. He looked over at Katara, her bright eyes and wide smile, and he let the anger go.

The red flame grew.

* * *

Aang came to visit. Katara came as well, and even brought Suki. It had only been a couple of weeks since Katara’s last visit, but Aang could hardly wait and Zuko was glad for the company. He was still his bubbly little self, literally bouncing off of the walls as he told Zuko all about his travels and experiences. Zuko smiled and laughed along, and was surprised at how easy it was to fall back into friendship with the boy he once hunted to the edge of the earth.

Aang was going on about one of his spirit world experiences, when Katara announced that she and Suki were going to browse the markets of Caldera City. Zuko took the time to show Aang around his home. Aang was as enthusiastic as ever, bowing and saying “hotman,” to every person in the palace. Zuko rolled his eyes and hissed at him to cut it out, but Aang only smiled.

“Sure thing, Sifu Hotman.”

“I thought I told you to stop calling me that!”

Aang laughed, and Zuko found himself reluctantly joining in. They talked about Iroh, and of the Earth Kingdom. Aang became very mature when talking about the state of the world, and even had some great ideas on trade and other commerce issues.

“-and I’ve been talking to Sokka, and as long as he can convince the North Pole, then we should be able to get fully functional trade routes set up within the next five years.” That was good news, but Zuko had been once again caught up hearing Sokka’s name. He had missed his friend greatly. Sokka was super busy traveling between both Water Tribes, and only had time for a few short letters here and there. Zuko’s heart ached whenever he thought of him.

“Hey,” Aang said softly. Zuko looked down and saw his gray eyes full of knowing. He felt bare as Aang stared at him.

“I’m sure Sokka will visit soon. We’re seeing him next month, I’ll convince him to come see you! Avatar’s orders.” Zuko chuckled and they both pretended he wasn’t blushing. He didn't quite know how to deal with Aang of all people, being the one to see straight through his crush. 

“Thanks, Aang, but I’m sure Sokka is busy. The Water Tribes have been separate for so long, he must have his hands full…” Aang pondered this for a moment as the passed through the palace and into the training grounds.

“I guess..” he said, “but friends should still make time for each other. I’ll make sure he comes soon.” Zuko nodded stiffly, and pretended not to see the way Aang lifted his eyebrows. He knew he shouldn’t be too surprised, he was the Avatar after all.

“Hey Zuko!” Aang said, a literal bounce back in his step as he stepped out on the training floor, “I’ve got a great idea!”

“If you’re idea is another “fake” Agni Kai, then it isn’t really great, Aang.”

“Sure it is!”

Zuko sighed, but Aang was already stripping off his Fire Nation robes. Rolling his eyes, Zuko shrugged off his own robe and joined Aang on the floor.

“Before anything, don’t forget-”

“My forms, yeah yeah I know Sifu Hotman.”

Zuko glanced up towards the sky and groaned, trying to hide his smile. They spent ten minutes warming up through the basic firebending forms before taking opposite stances on either side of the floor.

“Remember, no cheating this time!” Zuko called out.

“Hey, you had Katara during your Agni Kai with Azula! I think that means I get to use a little water bendin-”

“No.”

“Okay.”

Zuko sent the first blast. He always did. Aang dodged perfectly, in true airbender fashion, jumping and flipping over Zuko’s blast with grace. They danced around each other, slowly getting closer throughout the entire fight, until Zuko was right up on Aang. He sent a particularly nasty wave of fire to Aang’s left, but Aang planted his feet firmly, like Toph, and blasted through it. Zuko smiled to himself. He was really coming into this whole “Avatar” business, and his fire bending had definitely improved over the past couple of years. He looked incredibly focused, parry all of Zuko’s attacks and still managing to blast out several of his own.

It happened quickly.

Zuko got close, _really_ close, to Aang. He tried to attack his legs and shift him off of his balance, (something he had once learned was a sure-fire way to take down an earth bender) but Aang’s reflexes had taken over. With his hand out flat, palm up, he swiped his hand directly towards Zuko’s face. Towards his scar. The exact same move he had seen when he was thirteen. Zuko had a flashback to that fateful day, and felt a wave of nausea and panic overcome him that he hadn’t felt in years. He dropped to his knees.

 _“Stop!”_ Somebody had called out, their voice full of fear. It took Zuko a minute to realize it was his. Aang immediately dropped to his knees.

“Zuko, I’m so sorry!” Zuko stood up quickly, brushing off the apology and smiling down at Aang. He pretended that his heart wasn’t still thumping in his chest.

“It’s fine. You caught me by surprise, that’s… that’s good.” He extended his hand to Aang in a silent offering; _let's forget about it._ But Aang had learned how to be stubborn.

“Zuko, I know about your scar.” He said it sadly, as if a small part of him didn't want to say it at all.

Shock hit Zuko first, though he didn’t know why. It would have made sense for Katara or Toph to tell him what had happened.

“Oh…” he said weakly.

“I’m so sorry, I didn’t mean to strike you the same way Ozai did, it was reflex I swear-” But Zuko had stopped listening. He hadn’t told Katara or Toph the exact movements that Ozai had used against him, but somehow Aang had known.

“Was it..did Katara tell you?”

“Katara knows?" Aang said in confusion, "No she didn’t tell me. I imagine if she knows then she’s keeping it a secret out of respect for you.” Zuko felt the red warmth flood into his chest again.

“Oh, so then Toph?” Aang squinted his eyes, clearly hiding his slight annoyance.

“Toph knows too? No she didn’t tell me either. Zuko does everybody know but me?”

“But _you_ do know.”

“Yeah but not from _you_ -”

“Exactly, how do _you_ -”

“Does Sokka know?’

Zuko snapped his mouth shut. No _way_ does Sokka know. _No, no, no_. He couldn’t imagine trying to have that conversation with him...Sokka would probably pull a Toph and try to fight his father. Or pull a Katara and cry on the floor with him with the angriest eyes he had ever seen.

“No,” he said quietly, joining Aang back down on the training mat.

“No, Sokka doesn’t know.” Aang frowned, his eyes searching Zuko’s for...something.  
“So Toph, Katara, and I know, but you haven’t told Sokka?” There was something in his voice… something knowing that Zuko didn’t like.

“Look, I don’t even know how you know.”

Aang shifted uncomfortably. “Well, I didn’t know for sure, until just now. I just...when I fought the Fire Lord a few years ago, he used that move on me. He was going to strike my face in the same spot, and something in my knew then that it wasn’t the first time he had done it to somebody. It wasn’t until I saw your reaction that I pieced together that it was you.” His voice was soft, as usual, but Aang wouldn’t look at him.

“Well, you’re right.”

Aang said nothing, and Zuko said nothing, and for a few moments they sat together on the training floor of the Fire Nation palace, under the scrutinizing heat.

“You shouldn’t blame yourself, you know.”

Zuko looked up angrily, but Aang still wouldn’t meet his eye. He was studying the clouds with intensity.

“I don’t!”

“You do.”

“I don’t!”

“You do.”

“I do _not!_ ”

“Well, you did.”

Zuko huffed and a little smoke escaped his chapped lips. “Well I don’t anymore. I blame Ozai.” Aang finally looked over at him, concern etched all over his face. Zuko felt defensive again, and found himself slightly puffing out. He wasn’t sure what it was about this kid that he so desperately needed approval, especially since Aang loved him regardless.

“What,” he asked with mirth, “do you expect me to just forgive him, just like that?”

Aang stared straight at Zuko, his stormy eyes never once blinking as he gently reached a hand out to his friend and said,

“No, Zuko. I think you should forgive yourself.” It was something Uncle had been telling him for years now. That he would only find true happiness once he had come to terms with all the emotions welled up inside of him, and as Zuko stared at the young Avatar he realized that he had begun to neglect that task. A task, he knew, he would be working on for the rest of his life. Aang smiled at him, and Zuko smiled shyly back. The overwhelming feelings were back, but he realized that with such powerful allies on his side, he could take them on any day.

Aang ruined the moment with the marble trick.

Later, when they had finished their duel, and Aang stood up and offered Zuko his hand, the flame inside of Zuko’s chest burned yellow. Yellow for forgiveness. Forgiveness for his nation. Forgiveness from his uncle. 

Forgiveness from himself.

* * *

The news that the Southern Water Tribe was sending an ambassador to the palace didn’t spark anything in Zuko until he read that they were sending Sokka. Sokka, his friend. Sokka who he hadn’t seen in months. Sokka, who he was pretty sure he was in love with.

Sokka arrived a few weeks after the letter, and Zuko did his best not to run into his arms the same way he had with Katara. Sokka greeted him with a toothy smile and a tight bear hug that lasted just a little bit too long. Zuko breathed him in, and soon the two were chatting as if they had never been apart. Zuko had always had an easy relationship with Sokka. Katara and him may have understood each other, but Sokka and him worked well together. It was apparent in the way that Sokka knew how to redirect meetings that Zuko got frustrated in. It was apparent in the way that Sokka could finish Zuko’s trains of thought during proposal meetings. It was apparent in the way Sokka found Zuko sitting outside on his balcony, in the middle of the night, just to get some fresh air.

Sokka had been in the Fire Nation for a few months now, and Zuko had done his best to keep his distance. He and Sokka were so in sync, he was sure somebody would notice his gooey faces for the Water Tribe boy any day now. Maybe even Sokka himself. The thought sent shivers of horror down Zuko’s spine.

“Good evening, your Firey-ness.”

Zuko turned sharply. It wasn’t often that somebody was able to sneak up on him, but when he really wanted to, Sokka could move very, very quietly.

“Ah, if it isn’t my favorite Ambassador.”

Sokka chuckled and took the chair next to Zuko. Zuko didn’t ask what Sokka was doing in his room in the middle of the night. He wasn’t sure his heart could handle the answer.

“Don’t let Ambassador Bouzhai hear that. They’ve been trying to butter you up all week.” Zuko chuckled in agreement. The Earth Kingdom Ambassador had been playing a little bit of a brown noser. They sat in silence for a moment, before Zuko finally asked,

“To what do I owe the pleasure?” Sokka glanced up towards the stars before answering. Zuko wondered if he missed the South Pole.

“I saw how exhausted you looked during our meeting after dinner. Figured you wouldn’t be able to sleep so I thought I would come offer my brilliant company.” Zuko tried not to let the idea of Sokka watching and understanding him so perfectly mess with his emotions. It didn’t work. He did his best to keep his voice even as he said,

“Your company is quite brilliant. And very appreciated.”

Sokka smiled widely and Zuko felt something burst in his chest. The flame he had been trying so desperately to get under control was about to burst out of him.

“I missed you, you know,” Sokka said quietly, and Zuko did his best to keep his pulse even. “When I was in the South Pole.”

“I missed you too,” Zuko said quietly.

“I’m glad I’m here.”

“You don’t miss your home?” Sokka looked over and Zuko finally met his eyes. Sokka shrugged, a small smile creeping onto his face. “Sure, but without Katara and Aang and Toph and...well _you_ , it doesn’t really feel like home. Besides I was working all the time. What’s the point of working all the time if your friends aren’t around to make you laugh? You can only talk to the moon for so long before you start to go crazy.”

Zuko hid a smile behind his hand as he stifled a yawn. He remembered the conversation the had years ago, in a war balloon, on the way to free Hakoda from prison. _“My last girlfriend turned into the moon.”_

“That’s rough buddy.”

Sokka looked over in shock, and Zuko knew at once that he hadn’t expected Zuko to remember that exchange. But how could he forget? There wasn’t anything, anything about Sokka that Zuko would forget. After a few wide eyed moments, Sokka burst out laughing and Zuko followed shortly. The silence that followed was comfortable and peaceful, and Zuko felt like the missing part of his inner flame had finally come home. He turned over to Sokka, his mouth open to say something, (exactly what he wasn’t sure) but all he found was Sokka staring at him with a dopey look on his face.

“Zuko…”

Zuko hated how much he liked the way Sokka whispered his name. How it rolled off of his tongue with melodic precision that made the hairs on Zuko’s arms stand straight up. He hated the way his heartbeat quickened and his face heated up. He hated how much he loved Sokka.

He especially hated how much he was lying to himself. 

“Sokka.”

“Look, man. It’s been a while since I’ve done this and I hope I’m not overstepping my boundaries but-” Zuko rolled his eyes.

“What, Sokka.”

“Oh mighty Fire Lord, can I kiss you?”

Zuko froze. Every nerve in his body was on fire and singing. _Yes! They screamed. Yes, yes, yes! A thousand times yes!_

“No.”

“Wha-oh. Oh _shit_ , Zuko I’m sorry I didn’t mean to misrea-” Zuko shook his head miserably. He never had been good at letting himself have what was good for him.

“You don’t want me, Sokka. I’m so scarred and-”

“What are you talking about, your face?!” Sokka blurted out. He was kneeling in front of Zuko now, his hands on either side of Zuko’s thighs, eyes wide and honest, heart on full display.

“What?” Zuko asked taken aback. _No_ he wasn’t talking about his actual scar, leave it to Sokka to think-

“Look, I’m sorry that I have been so MIA these past couple of years. I’m sorry that I’ve been a shitty friend. I stayed away because I knew if I came here, I wouldn’t be able to resist you. I’m so sorry Zuko, I really didn’t want to fuck anything up, but I can’t sit here and let you think your scar is such a factor in your worth-”

“My scar? No! I just meant in general, Sokka. Just as a person, I am scarred and flawed and I’m the Fire Lord and I’m a mess, and there are better people you could want to kiss.” He was miserable admitting all of his fears to Sokka, but it was a relief to know that no matter what happened in these next few moments, he would have closure.

“That is,” Sokka said, his voice low and his face hovering just inches away from Zukos, “the stupidest thing you have ever said.” His breath was hot on Zuko's face, and Zuko felt a shiver run down his spine.

“Sokka,” he breathed, and spirits help him, he _wanted_. Wanted with a fire so deep in him he was sacared to know what it would feel like if he woke it up. Sokka ran his fingers lightly over Zuko’s scar.

“I don’t care what scars you carry, Zuko. Physical or not. I...I love you for you. I _love_ you. You don’t have to be scared of me.”

And Zuko believed him. He really, _really_ did. But fear was so familiar.

“Sokka,” he breathed, not sure what it was he was going to say.

“Yes?”

“Can I tell you something?”

“Anything.”

Zuko breathed in. He hadn’t willingly given this information without prodding in...maybe ever. But he wanted to tell Sokka. Wanted him to know what he was signing up for. Wanted him to know that Zuko was still fighting, that he probably would be, for the rest of his life.

“The reason I was banished,” Zuko said, his voice wavering, “was because I spoke out in a war meeting.” Sokka’s eyebrows scrunched together, and Zuko was reminded of how Katara’s had done the same. He remembered how angry she had been on his behalf, how sad and accepting Toph had been, how forgiving Aang had been. Sokka waited patiently for Zuko to continue.

“I was thirteen. My father and his generals planned to send our own troops down for slaughter. I...I couldn’t sit by and listen to that, so I spoke up.” Sokka looked like he was going to be sick. His eyes kept glancing towards Zuko’s scar, and Zuko knew that he was already three steps ahead of his story. His heart warmed a little at how brilliant his beautiful Sokka was. He breathed in, shaky and uneven, and continued.

“It was...considered disrespectful, to challenge the General like that. I was challenged myself. To an Agni Kai.” Sokka bent his head down, the tips of his hair tickling against Zuko’s knees, a low groan coming from the back of his throat.

“Zuko,” Sokka said, and Zuko hated the way his voice sounded. _Wrecked._ “Zuko, _please_ tell me your father did not fight you in an Agni Kai.”

Zuko was almost proud of him. Nobody else had guessed that it was Ozai whom Zuko had to fight, not the General, but Sokka knew a thing or two about war, and he knew a thing or two about the Fire Nation. Zuko nodded stiffly.

“Yes.”

“You didn’t, did you?”

Sokka also knew a thing or two about him.

“No.”

Sokka sucked in his breath, and looked up from Zuko’s lap.

“Sokka, I’m sorry. Everybody else already knows. Toph asked, Aang figured it out when he fought Ozai, and Katara...well honestly I don’t really remember how Katara found out I was really drunk but-”

“But you _told_ me.” Sokka said, his voice full of emotion. Zuko stared in awe. He hadn’t thought of it like that.

“Yeah,” he said softly, reaching a hand out towards Sokka’s face, gently cupping his cheek. “Yeah, I wanted you to know.”

“Why?”

“Because loving me will be a lot of work.”

“I’m nothing if not resilient.”

“I know.”

Sokka smiled a little bit at that, but his eyes were still heavy and full of sadness. He gently lifted his hands up towards Zuko’s face.

“Can...can I?” Zuko nodded. Sokka traced the outline of his scar gently. So gently, that Zuko barely even felt it. He ran his fingers down Zuko’s neck, his arm, his waist. And then, Sokka leaned in and ever so gently planted a kiss right on Zuko’s cheek. Zuko pulled him closer, and kissed him full on the mouth.

“If you let me,” Sokka panted as he pulled off of Zuko, “I’ll stay by your side so you’ll never be alone again, Zuko.” He peppered kisses across Zukos face. Across his scar and his forehead and his nose. “Please let me.” Zuko smiled as Sokka kissed him again, and he felt something loosen in his chest. He would have to write to Uncle tomorrow and tell him all about Sokka. Uncle would be ecstatic.

“I would love that.”

Sokka celebrated with a fist in the air and a “ _Wahoo!_ ” that probably woke up the entire nation, but Zuko didn’t mind. He was laughing and smiling and letting the feeling in his chest envelop his entire body.

The flame inside of him burned white this time. Wild and unrestrained, he felt the warmth of the it surround his entire body. He remembered Tophs wide eyes, Katara's angry eyes, Aang's forgiving eyes, and Sokka's loving eyes. The flame burned white.

White for how much he loved Sokka. White for how much he loved his Uncle and his friends. White for how much he loved his nation.

White, for how much he loved himself.

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading! Poke me on Tumblr @killerrach if you ever wanna chat! Leave a comment and/or kudos to let me know what you think! Thanks <3
> 
> ~Rach


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